Lightning Lad & Scooby Doo Get A Clue!
by JudeDeluca
Summary: Garth wants a dog. And he gets one when a little incident in the time stream brings our favorite mystery-solving dog to the future. But how? And why? And what about those two Gotham bad girls wreaking havoc in the city? Looks like a mystery, gang!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Legion of Super-Heroes, Scooby Doo, Gotham Girls, or Superman. I do however, own Ebony Dent, and if she's used without my consent I'LL HUNT YOU BLOODSUCKING VULTURES DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A PIG!

This is the brainchild born from the minds of those who compared Lightning Lad's season two look to Shaggy Rogers from _Scooby Doo_, which was brought forth on a picture Pacerpaw made on DA. With her consent she put up the plot bunny of Scooby Doo winding up in the 31st Century and mistaking LL for Shaggy. A little while later, 1000GreenSun did a drabble on the forums based on that idea, with a little added Lightning Lad/Dream Girl, at my request, as payment for using some quotes from my Vital Info fic. So, I decided to fully adopt the idea, adding in my DC OC Ebony Dent, and putting in characters from Superman and Batman, expanding from that drabble. Thanks, ladies.

I don't now if I could, but I'm pretty sure I'm pulling the same thing the writers at JLU did with Green Lantern and Hawkgirl. And Garth is not as stupid as he looks.

* * *

**Lions, Tigers, and Hogs! Inside The Bubble's A Talking Dog!**

"You want a what?"

"A pet. Well, a dog, actually."

Brainiac 5 was sitting at the computer console in his new lab when Lightning Lad came in with this request. For a moment, the green-skinned blonde Coluan gave an incredulous look to the shaggy redhead with the little goatee and the metal arm.

"I see. And this is something that just popped in your head." Brainiac 5 mused.

"No, I've been thinking about it for a while and now just seemed like an okay opportunity." He tried to explain.

"And how do you think I can help with this?" Brainiac 5 asked.

"Well Cos said, *a-hem*, 'I will NOT have some mangy mongrel who barks all the time! I need my beauty rest!' Ugh, Cham is better at impressions than I am. So, I thought maybe you could help find a dog that won't bother Cos?"

"How?" And here came the answer to the 5 Million Credit Question.

"Well I thought you could go into the time stream and-"

Brainiac's answer was simple.

"No. No, no, no, HELL no. The time stream is not a toy for you to mess around with just because Cos said no." He was quite clear on that, but Lightning Lad did not take the hint.

"Oh come on Brainy! You know about all kinds of loopholes about the time stream! Like how you were able to bring Superman back here without destroying the whole world."

"Even if I did, IF being the key word, saw it that way, I honestly don't think you'd be capable of taking care of a dog. No offense."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Garth crossed his arms.

"Garth, you barely remember to shower."

"Hey I shower!"

Brainy gave him a "look". Garth looked away a minute in a bit of embarrassment.

"...occasionally. And for your information I had a Winathian Fluffrat which I took care of for three years. THREE years. Beat that."

"And what happened to it?"

Oh geez. He was not ready for that. Garth looked hesitant to answer.

"...it ran away. Look, Brainy-"

"No, Garth. It's too risky." Brainy turned back to the monitor screen working on his current project, pushing the boundaries of the universe into others.

"Fine, okay."

Garth turned around and prepared to leave the lab in defeat, when he turned his head back to Brainy and gave him a sly look while he spoke with nonchalance.

"By the way, I'm sure the girls would just love to see those pictures of you at that Christmas party when you drank too much eggnog and you puked on their-"

Brainy turned right around with an angry look on his face.

"Oh don't even, Garth! I had those files destroyed."

"But not the hard copies." Garth almost said in singsong.

"I'll just-"

"You think I'm dumb enough to hide them in HQ? Please."

There was a brief pause, Garth looking triumphant and Brainy fantasizing about killing him and dancing a merry jig on his shallow grave.

"...I hate you SO much right now."

"So you'll help...?" Garth leaned forward. Brainy let out a sigh.

"MAYBE."

"Woo-hoo!"

Garth jumped up in the air in happy excitement. He was gonna get a dog!

"And you're not pairing up with Phantom Girl anymore! This has her mark all over it."

"Y'mean just like you marked-"

"Say one more word and I'll toss you into the time stream."

"My lips are sealed. Thanks, Brainy."

As he left, a now annoyed Brainy started muttering to himself.

"...Stupid Ultra Boy spiking the stupid eggnog."

...

It was a quiet day in the Legion HQ. The boys were doing their thing, the girls went out for the day, and Ebony Dent was in the longue playing _Super Mario 64_, a game that was old even by her standards. Currently, she was wearing those ripped jeans of her's and a black T-shirt with a skull and crossbones, a _Black Terror _t-shirt. She was just about started on the Dire, Dire Docks level, which she mostly played because she liked the background music, when Garth flew in, whistling mostly to himself and smiling. Ebony picked that up as she turned away from the game and greeted him.

"Hey Raggedy Andy. You sure look like you're in a good mood."

"Do I?" he asked. It hadn't occurred to him.

"What happened? Short Magno Boy's sheets?" Ebony said with a somewhat tone of sarcasm. She enjoyed the thought of Cos freaking out.

"No, but good idea. I can't tell. I'm saving it as a surprise."

Ebony now paused the game and threw her hands up in fake wonderment, her rose crest ring visible on her ring finger.

"Ooh, mystery. Smoking guns, red herrings, one-armed men..."

"Blah blah blah." Garth replied. She just laughed. "Well whatever reason, I'm glad you're in a good mood." This was meant with honesty. Since she got there, with the Legion, Garth, and a few of the others became her friends. And believe me, it felt good to have friends without worrying about certain... things. Well, more then the problems she was dealing with now. But, things were calm, and that was good.

Garth sat down next to Ebony and put his feet up on the table as she did, and she started to gently give him a noogie.

"You know I wouldn't want my blushing bride to be upset."

"Would you knock it off with that 'Bride' crap?" (See _Virtual Star Embryology_)

"Oh I'm sorry. I wouldn't want to make Imra and Nura jealous." She said as she moved away a strand of her long, jet-black hair from her blue eyes.

"It's just Nura now." Garth reminded her, his electric blue eyes meeting hers. "Imra's with Cos now and I'm happy for her."

Ebony didn't say anything. She just gave him her own "look".

"Really!" he said to sound convincing.

"Uh-huh. Well hey, it's your life, I'm just visiting." She shut the Mario game off and started to scroll down a list of games programmed into COMPUTO.

"Speaking of Nura, you seen her at all?" Garth asked. Truth be told, he hadn't seen her all day, but from some reason he was thinking of Imra too. He kept reminding himself that Nura was his girlfriend now, and he was happy. Ebony picked up on that too, but there was actual happiness there. But that longing he had for Imra didn't go away just yet.

"I think she went with the other girls for a little shopping spree. You know, 'girl time'." There was girl time, and then there was _girl time_. This was the latter.

"Gotcha."

"Wanna get your ass kicked in _Super Smash Brothers Melee_?" She held up another controller and handed it to him.

"Ha! I'd like to see try."

"You make me breakfast if I do."

"Same to you."

_Press Start_.

...

"Let's see... no, too blue."

The picture on the screen went from a little blue dog to a dalmatian. One of many, actually.

"No, too many spots."

"How 'bout this one?"

The next picture had a white dog standing on two legs, an apathetic look on his face, and holding a martini glass. Garth read the description.

"Wow. Drug addict AND an alcoholic. Next."

Brainy went to the next picture. The two were going through COMPUTO's files on dogs from the past, looking for one for Garth as Brainy decided to indulge in his little fantasy, against his will.

"How about this?"

The thing on screen looked rabid, and was somehow coming out of an old photograph.

"I'm pretty sure that thing's not a dog."

"How about this?"

The next dog was a skinny little, peach-colored dog with a manic expression as he was beating up a red cat.

"What's an 'asthma-hound chihuahua'?" Garth asked. That thing looked sickly, and psychotic.

"Whatever it is, you're looking at it." Brainy replied.

"No."

With each click on the screen, and every denied dog, Brainy's annoyed look grew worse as his nerves started hanging on a thread.

"This?"

There were two. A big gray dog with no visible eyes, and a small brown one that looked kinda like the chihuahua from before.

"I only want one."

Next file.

"This?"

A little skeleton dog with a collar that read "Scraps".

"Something that's not dead."

Next file.

"This?"

"No."

Next file.

"This?"

"No."

Next file.

"This?"

"No."

Next file.

"This?"

"Hell no!"

Brainy threw his hands up in frustration and turned to Garth.

"I know. Why don't I rip your head open, and just scoop out your idea for the perfect dog and make it a reality using magic pixie dust! Would that help?!"

"What's your problem?" Garth asked obliviously. Brainy got up in has face.

"PICK ONE!"

BEEP!

"Wait, what's this?"

The screen currently went to a diagram that represented the timestream. There was a flashing blue light.

"What does that flashing light mean?" Garth pointed to said light as Brainy began to explain. "It represents a disturbance in the timestream, usually when someone in the past tries to use an amateur time machine. Thank you very much Mr. Wells. Basically whoever has the misfortune to be near one when it backfires gets sent wandering in the time stream until they land in some random location." Brainy started typing at the controls.

"Can you do anyth-"

"Easily. I'll just redirect whoever it is to here using the Time Bubble, then after a little tweaking, we can send him, her, them, it back without any memory of the 31st Century, or creating any problems."

"What happens if it's something bad?"

"The scanners would've already detected it. The blue light represents minimal threat. Had it been a black light, well... I hope you made peace with Imra."

"Nura!" He had to remind him as well.

"Whatever. Besides, if it is bad, it gives me a chance to test out my new security designs. CHECK THIS OUT!"

At Brainy's command, an innumerable amount of guns and lasers just appeared out of the walls. And they were all aimed at Garth. He deadpanned.

"You had a lot of free time when you were away, didn't you?"

"Lots. Lemme just take care of this and then we can get back to this."

The Time Bubble in Brainy's lab disappeared in a burst of light. Seconds later, it returned again, bringing with it smoke and fog as it hissed open. The two started to cough in the smoke. Coughing was one of the things Brainy hated about his human body, besides that feeling you get when you have to use the bathroom. Garth began to charge up when they saw something dart out.

"Alright come out you-GAH!" Garth got cut off when whatever it was in the fog jumped on him. As the smoke cleared, Invisible Kid came running in.

"What's going on? I heard a-" he stopped when he saw Garth on the floor, being licked by whatever jumped on him.

"What is that?"

"I think we just found you a pet, Garth"

...

"_Can you feel the sunshine? Does it brighten up your day?..." _Nura was gently singing that tune to herself as she was walking down the hallway. She and the other girls had just come back from their trip to the Galactic Galleria Mall, and, sadly, she came back empty-handed, as did the others. There was just nothing interesting on sale today.

"Nura!" Garth ran breathlessly over to his silver-haired girlfriend.

"Yeah?" Nura stifled a laugh. She greeted her boyfriend with a quick peck on the cheek. That's when she noticed something weird. Was there drool dripping on his beard?

"You know how I wanted a pet?" Garth leaned back on the wall, wiping off the drool on his chin.

"Yeah..." Nura said slowly.

"Okay, well Cos specifically said 'I will NOT have some mangy mongrel who barks all the time! I need my beauty rest!'. "Now get this," Garth started. "With a little help from Brainy and a little time skipping, I found something that not only will sprock Cos off to the next planet, I get a pet."

"I gotta see this," Dream Girl grinned.

"Yeah, but he's a little disoriented at the moment."

"Brainy?" She asked.

"No! My new pet. Brainy won't let him out his lab yet until he's sure he won't cause a, what was the phrase, 'complete discharge of entropy onto the 31st Century.'"

"You don't even know what entropy means."

"Yeah, I do. It's some kinda fish right?" He joked as he returned the favor with a peck on her cheek. She laughed.

...

Now later that night, Cosmic Boy had just about completed a call from nature and was heading back to his room to continue his so-called "beauty sleep". He had on black sweatpants a Magnoball jersey for the Metropolis Monarchs. He passed by Brainy's lab when he heard a noise.

"Brainy?"

The noise stopped.

"Anyone in here?"

No reply. Cos shrugged and went back on his way, when there was another noise.

"Okay I know there's someone in there. Come out!"

No reply. Cos cautiously entered Brainy's lab. The thought of an intruder was worrisome, but what was even more scary was if he interrupted Brainy in the middle of an experiment. The new human Brainy was a lot more temperamental then before, even if he didn't have laser guns coming out of his shoulders anymore. There were test tubes and beakers, holo-pads and data-pads scattered around. Slow blinking lights and a small red light on the monitor gave an eerie glow in the dark. Cos forgot where the light switch was. This was the new lab after all. He tried to make out other forms in the dark as he felt around the wall looking for a light switch.

"Hello? Who's in here? Show yourself!"

"Rikes!"

"'Rikes?'" Cos flipped on the light switch, and saw a little surprise shaking on the lab floor.

"WHAT IS THAT!?!" Cosmic Boy pointed to a brown Great Dane with black spots scattered around him.

"Rhat's rhat?" the dog replied.

"OH MY GOD! IT'S TALKS!"

"Roh my roodness! Rhat rugly rurple rhing ralks!"

Cos felt faint. There was a dog in here. A dog. And he was _talking_. And only one name popped into his mind. _Garth_.

"What"s with all the raucous?" Nura sleepily rubbed her eyes as she walked into the room. She was wearing a pair of white pajama pants, an alice blue tanktop, and a black sleeping mask on her head. Her hair was a mess. She saw the dog. "Aww!"

"Raww!" the dog ran up to Nura and she rubbed him behind the ears.

"What"s your name, boy?" Nura asked, obviously not expecting an answer.

"Rooby Dooby Doo!"

"Wh-" Nura burst into laughter. Just then, Lightning Lad walked into the room, awoken by the noise from down the hall. He was wearing black pajama pants and a green tank top.

"I see you found our second new tenant."

"RAGGY!" Scooby ran over to Lightning Lad.

"Hey, boy," Garth greeted the dog as he ran up to him. "You okay, Scooby?"

"What did I specifically say, Garth?" Cosmic Boy said grumpily as he tapped his feet on the floor, the way someone does when they're annoyed or are waiting impatiently.

"He doesn't bark. Scout's honor."

"You were never a scout." Cos said through gritted teeth.

"Nit pick, nit pick."

"Rit rick, rit rick."

...

In a quite part of New Metropolis, there was a flash of light, and then...

"They did it right in front of me!"

"And I'm telling you for the last time they did not pee on... your... Red, where are we?"

The blonde-haired, blue-eyed Harleen Quinzell, a.k.a. Harley Quinn, and the red-haired, green-eyed (and green skinned) Pamela Isley, a.k.a. Poison Ivy, were awestruck at their surroundings. At first, they were in their apartment, arguing over whether or not Harley's hyenas had or had not peed in Ivy's plants, and then, the two found themselves here. Ivy began to analyze the surroundings.

"Hmm, let's see. Futuristic buildings, absolutely no smog or pollution in the air, no graffiti as far as the eye can see or gang-banging to speak of, and flying cars. It seems-"

"We're at the Epcott Center!" Harley cut in. "That means we can go to Disneyworld!" That earned her a slight bonk on the hand.

"No, genius, we're in the future." "How can ya tell, Red?" Harley inquired. "Because you're standing in front of a display that says 'Re-Elect Winema Wazzo, 3008-3012.'"

Harley turned around, and nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw the large, holographic poster of a woman with black hair and gray eyes, obviously the aforementioned Miss Wazzo.

"Wow... a woman president!" Harley said. "And it only took a millennium." Ivy replied sarcastically. But the idea of a woman president felt inpsiring.

"But how'd we get here?" Harley asked. "And how are we gonna get home? I left the babies all by their lonesome! They can't function without me!"

_Back in the 21st Century_

Bud and Lou, Harley's beloved babies, began re-arranging Ivy's plants and tidying up the apartment as they waited for the Chinese food they ordered.

_"How long will Mommy be gone_?" Lou barked/laughed in hyena speak to Bud.

"_If she's gone for three weeks we go to Mexico._"

_Back in the 31st Century_

"I'm pretty sure those two weapons of mass destruction are fine, Harl." Ivy said in an attempt to comfort her friend. It didn't work, since Harley was now shaking Ivy very violently by the shoulders.

"But what if we never get home, Red?! What if we never get to see Gotham again?! WHAT IF I NEVER SEE MISTAH J AGAIN?!"

SMACK!

"Get a hold of yourself, woman!" Ivy commanded. "And my guess is that they probably have something that can get us back. No problem. But think about it. If this is the future, then that means there's practically no chance of any pointed-eared rodents flying around. And that also means that there's none of the competition. No Scarface, Croc, Penguin, Catwoman..."

"Puddin'." Harley almost cried. If this was the future, then that meant her beloved Mistah J was probably dead. And she never got the chance to hear those sweet words come out of his crimson mouth.

"Hell, there are probably planets out there just ripe for the picking!"

"I guess." Harley said, unsure of the situation.

"Let's go! There's a whole universe out there!" Ivy looked up in the sky with hopes and ambitions... of pure greed and renewed botanical fanaticism.

_Whole planets out there, filled with lush green vegetation. Veritable edens. New species of plants, boundless potential. When we get back, I can turn Earth into a paradise._

Harley was thinking of something else...

_I wonder if I remembered to turn stove off?_

Ivy started off when she noticed she was walking alone.

"Well?" Ivy turned around.

"No. I'm still mad at you for slapping me." Harley stood her ground and pouted.

"I'm sorry Harl. But you were acting hysterical."

"I'm still mad."

"Would it make you feel better if we started a riot at an ICU?" Ivy asked with sincerity.

"A little." Harley said as she rubbed her cheek.

So, the two Rogues set out to plunder the future world. After they left, the picture of Winema Wazzo stuck her head out of the screen, and started laughing in a man's voice.

"AHAHAHA!! AHAHAHAHAHA!!! *hack*, *hack*! I need a lozenge."

To Be Continued...

Questions? Opinions? Honest Criticism?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Legion, Gotham Girls, Superman, or Scooby Doo.

Note: It was the best rhyme I could think of.

* * *

**Legion Houseguests One and Two. Ebony Dent & Scooby Doo**

...

"Alright, come out you-GAH!"

All of a sudden, the thing that had left the Time Bubble had just jumped on Garth and knocked him to the floor. Invisible Kid flew in to see what was happening.

"I think we just found you a pet, Garth." Was what Brainiac 5 said. The thing was on top of Garth and was licking his face. "H-hey! Cut that out! I'm flattered but I've got a girlfriend."

"RAGGY!"

"Raggy?" Brainy asked Lyle. "Girlfriend?" Lyle asked Brainy. The smoke finally cleared, and Garth got a good look at the thing. It, or he, was a great dane with brown fur and black spots all over him. "Whoa. Hey there. Who're you?" Garth asked, not expecting an answer.

"Rooby Dooby Doo!" the dog replied. "Well my name's Garth. And-" He stopped short when he realized that the dog just talked.

"Reah...?" "Dude, did you just talk?" he asked the dog. "Reah! Rhere ram I?"

Garth looked up at Brainy and Lyle. "Brainy. Lyle. He talks. He's a talking dog. A talking dog."

"Yes we gathered that." Brainy said. Garth just looked at the dog for a minute.

"THAT IS SO SPROCKING COOL!"

Brainy was puzzled at the way Garth was acting. He seemed like a ten-year old. "When did we go back to grade school? Garth, he's not yours." Brainy reminded him.

"Aw come on, Brainy. Can I keep him, Brainy? Can I, huh?"

"Only if you do your chores and eat all your broccoli." Lyle joked. Brainy glared at him "Don't encourage him, Lyle!" At that moment, Sun Boy walked in, having heard the noise.

"What's- hey, a dog, cool."

Garth tried to sit up on the floor, Scooby still on him. "I know, right? He's name's..." Garth looked at the nametag on the dog's collar. "Scooby Doo." Brainy was now annoyed. "We could very much be destroying existance with this conversation!" "Oh you're just mad because he gets a dog." Lyle ribbed Brainy. Dirk joined in. "A talking dog, and Koko isn't talking to you anymore." That was immediately the wrong thing to say. If this was a cartoon, you could hear dishes breaking when Brainy's eyes just got so big. "K-... Koko. Koko!" Brainy started bawling, to the shock of the other three.

"Smooth, Dirk." Garth said. "Reah, rmooth." Scooby mimicked. "Hey, he's got a sense of humor." Garth smiled as he rubbed Scooby's head while Dirk and Lyle tried to comfort Brainy. "Oh God I-I'm sorry Brainy." "You know how he feels about Koko!"

"Roko? Rot roko?" The thought of hot cocoa sounded good to Scooby, with marshmallows, whipped cream, sprinkles, anchovies, chocolate pudding, and a little cayenne pepper.

"You hungry, boy?" Garth asked.

...

Ebony Dent sat up in bed, breathing very fast, with sweat dripping down her face. She had a nightmare, another one. She could still remember seeing Bane's face as he took Batman and snapped his back on his knee, screaming how he had broken the Bat. She wiped some of the sweat from her forehead and went up to get something to drink, still half asleep. As she did, she saw Cos fly off in the opposite direction form Brainy's lab. She heard people talking, so she walked in.

"What are you doing up?" Nura asked.

"Bad dream. Came for-..." she stopped when she looked down, wide-eyed, and saw a familiar face from the cartoons she watched on Saturday. She then slowly raised her head back up to the other three. Nura, Garth, and Brainy.

"Is that Scooby Doo?"

"Yep."

"THE Scooby Doo?"

"Rhat's re."

Ebony rubbed some more of the sleep from her eyes and kneeled down to Scooby.

"Hey there. Aren't you a nice surprise." There was warmth in her voice, the kind of warmth you would hear from a mother. That was obvious since she was one, or at least used to be one.

"At least you're taking it better than Cos." Garth smirked.

"Cosmic Ass? How pissed was he?"

"Almost wet his pants." Nura said.

"And just like that I think I have a new best friend!" Ebony said as she hugged Scooby.

"Hey! I thought I was your best friend!" Garth took offense.

"You're a close second."

"Meeting, NOW!" Cos boomed on the intercom. Minutes later, most of the Legionnaires were in the meeting room, as were Ebony and Scooby. The other Legionnaires who were sleeping were a mess, and they were pissed royally.

"What the hell Rokk? It's the middle... of..." Phantom Girl trailed off when she and the other girls got a sight of the dog next to Garth. And, almost collectivley...

"AWWW!!"

"Poor guy. Never saw it coming."

...

"Now you all know me." Cos started. "I may have been a grump involving Karate Kid. I may have almost had Brin arrested. And I allowed Ebony to stay here because of what would happen if she didn't. But THIS, THIS is the last straw!"

"Cos, shut up!"

Everyone was now around Scooby, and the girls were dishing out unconditional love on the talking Great Dane.

"I'm surprised you guys are all surprised." Ebony said. Everyone else was standing around a surprised Scooby, who was still clinging next to Garth.

"Despite our advances in society, talking animals are still pretty rare in the future." Brainy explained. Ebony turned her view to Cos, still mad and grumpy.

"Then explain Magnet Boy."

"Hey!" Cos yelled, earning some laughs from the others.

"Brainy how could have him locked up in here without telling me?" Vi asked as she rubbed behind Scooby's ears as Nura did earlier. "Why you gotta hog the cuteness?"

"Oh there's plenty of cuteness going around, believe me." Brainy sarcastically replied.

"Aww who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?" Tinya was all over Scooby.

"Great, as if I didn't have enough competition." Jo said from the side.

"How come she never hugs me like that?" Sun Boy sulked as the Trips administered their love to Scooby.

"Because he's an adorable talking dog and you're a nymphomaniac with burning hands." Chuck told him.

"How come he gets a pet? I want a pet!" Tenzil whined.

"Is anyone else a little creeped out by this?" Hart asked.

"Why is Lightning Lad the lucky one?" Cham asked.

"Guys give him so room to breath!" Garth ordered. He tried to clear the ones smothering the dog so he could breath. Brainy turned to Imra, who was one of the few controlling her ugre to smother with unrequited and unconditional love for Scooby.

"Imra, can you scan his mind? We need to know what happened before he wound up here."

"Easily." She nodded and kneeled down to Scooby. "Hey there boy. I need you to relax for a minute, 'kay?" Imra gently patted his head, then both their eyes began to glow pink.

"Let's see... food, food, scooby snacks, shaggy, mystery machine, 'let's split up gang', some weird yappy thing, but... I can't get a clear memory of the last few minutes before he wound up in the time stream."

"I hate when that happens." Brainy moaned.

"Wait, you guys are taking forever to get me home but you have enough free time to go looking for a dog?" Ebony asked.

"Yeah." Garth said nonchalantly. "Rog? Rhere?" Scooby asked. Ebony turned to Cos and then to Scooby. "Ah well, if it puts his undies in a bigger bunch I'm cool." "Glad you see it that way." he smirked.

"Why do you keep putting me down?" Cos asked Ebony. She then narrowed her eyes at him. "Are you ever going to apologize for violating my mind?" "I did not violate your mind! What I did was justified!" "Then no."

"Guys I think the yelling is scaring him." Nura said. Scooby was shaking. "Oh, I'm sorry Scooby." Ebony apologized.

"I can't get anything now. Maybe some other time, or we might need Tellus." Imra said, still trying to scan Scooby's mind.

"Rorry Raggy." Scooby apologized. Garth just smiled. "It's okay, boy. Nothing to be sorry about. And my name's Garth, not Raggy."

"He's not calling you 'Raggy'. He's saying 'Shaggy'. You may have gathered by now that he pronounces most words with an 'R'." Brainy explained. "Yeah. Shaggy Rogers, the guy who owns him and his BFF." Chuck started to clear up. "Shaggy & Scooby Doo and the rest of Mystery Inc.. It's like Abbott & Costello, Peanut Butter & Jelly..."

"Batman and Superman." Vi said. "Superman and Batman." Brainy corrected. One word rang. _Fanboy_.

"Remember, I thought you were him when I got here." Ebony explained. Indeed, her first encounter, Ebony thought Garth was Shaggy Rogers. "Oh, yeah, right. But you never explained what the resemblance is." Garth told her. Ebony smirked as she walked over to him, still holding Scooby. "Well first off there are those adorable little whiskers growing out of your chin." She gently stroked Garth's little beard, bringing much jealousy and anger out of both Nura and Imra.

"I still think he's got the ugliest-" Tinya started. "Shut your mouth!" Nura and Imra cut her off, much to their surprise and Cos'. "I'm just talkin' bout Garth!" Tiny defended.

"And there is that bottomless black void of yours you call a gut, but other than that..." Ebony trailed off.

"What?"

"Reah. Rhat?" Scooby copied him. Vi laughed/snorted at that.

"Well you're more grungy than hippy. And you aren't exactly a coward..."

"'cept when it comes to girls." Cham said off handedly. Garth fumed at that, and Cham began to fear for his life. Brin wanted to get a better look at the dog and see what the fuss was.

"I don't understand what the big deal is." Scooby, seeing Brin, immediately jumped into Garth's arms. "Hey!" Brin said, taking offense. "Easy boy. That's just Brin." "Rerewolf!" "'Rere-heh!" Garth started to laugh.

"Oh don't worry, Timber Wolf's not a werewolf." Imra explained. "Yeah, he's a puppy just like you!" Tinya said. The others snickered at blushing Brin. "Go on Brin, lick his face and show him you're just like him."

"H-" he started, until Ebony appeared behind him and whispered maliciously in his ear.

"_You either lick his face or they'll be licking what's left of yours off the sidewalk_." No, she's not crazy, but she would do it, because she's done worse and there are articles in medical journals proving it. She'd be damned if she was gonna let some wolf-boy scare an innocent dog.

"You're a psycho, you know that?" he glared at her.

"And that's why you love me."

"Hey!" Tinya yelled. "Not so funny when you're not the one doing the flirting, is it Tinya?" Jo enjoyed watching Tinya get mad when someone else flirted with a guy she liked, the same way she'd flirt with Brin in front of him. "Shut it, Jo." She snapped at him. "Don't like crow?" He smiled a cocky smile.

"Go on..." The others motioned. Brin just stared at the dog for a minute. "Grrr..." he did accidentally. "Ripe!" Scooby yelled, which earned him an angry glare from Garth and the girls.

"Wow, Frau Blucher, you're skills with animals are almost as amazing as your bedside manner." Ebony told him. "Says you." "And the entire children's wards at St. Lucy's." She replied.

"Well hold up, we're getting ahead of ourselves." Imra said.

"What?" Nura asked.

"We still haven't done the polite thing." Imra told her. She turned to Scooby. "Would you like to stay with us for a while?" "Rure!" he happily replied. "See? You just gotta talk to him like he's a person."

"So he is staying with us. Where?" Brin asked.

"He can sleep in my room." Garth offered. "It's no prob."

"But Garth _darling_ there's not possibly enough room what with you, me, Nura, Imra, Jo..." Ebony spoke like a New York debutante as she said this.  
"HEY!" The four, along with Tinya and Cos, yelled. "What'd I say?" she asked innocently.

"Scooby, do you want your own room or would you like to stay in mine?" Garth asked.

"Rours." The dog replied. "Okay then." Ebony felt some pride swelling up as she saw Garth act like this. _He's gonna be a great dad someday_.

"Oh but we need to get him vaccinated for 31st Century diseases, and he needs to see the vet, and we need to buy some dog food..." Trip started to list off what they would need for Scooby.

"Rog rood? Ruck!" Scooby stuck his tounge out at the idea.

"He doesn't eat dog food. He eats people food. Another thing, enjoy being eaten out of house and home with this one." Ebony explained.

"When did we start talking about Bouncing Boy?" Garth explained.

"HEY!" Chuck and the Trips yelled.

"I still say this is a bad idea." Cos complained.

"Did you hear something?" Ebony asked. The others shook their head.

"So Scooby, it looks like you're staying with us until we can sort this out." Garth told the dog.

"It'll be nice to have someone to talk to who's also from out of town." Ebony said. She understood what it was liking being away from home. The difference in this case was that Scooby had friends home. Suddenly, Nura wrinkled her nose.

"Uh, what is that?"

Everyone else did. Someone just cut it. Then they turned to Cham, who they thought was the source of the foul odor that now floated through the room.

"What? Wasn't me!" He threw his hands up in defense.

"Rorry." Scooby said. "Yeah he does sometimes if he's nervous." Ebony said. "Happens to the best of us." Imra replied. "Not me." Hart said. "Well you ain't the best." Cham fired back.

...

"So this is my room. I'm not exactly the best housekeeper but it's home."

That was true. The room was a mess. Dirty clothes, holo-pads, posters of hot girls in sexy poses. Garth took a bunch of dirty clothes laying around and set them up like a make-shift bed, giving it a pillow and another blanket.

"You can sleep over there if you want, until we can get you something better."

"Rhanks, Raggy."

"It's Garth."

Scooby sulked a little. Garth felt bad for a minute for having to correct the dog, who was away from his friends and home.

"Look, sorry if this is scary for you. You're not actually the first house guest we've had in a while. But don't worry, the Legion looks out for our own. You got nothing to worry about. And those girls in there would not let a thing happen to you, 'specially the one with the black hair."

"Rhe razy?" he asked.

"A little, but in a good way."

There was a brief pause.

"And you can call me Shaggy if you want."

Scooby perked up.

"Oh, and, uh, thanks for covering for me." Garth blushed as he said that.

"Ro 'rob."

"Night Scooby."

"Rood right, Raggy."

"You are so sprocking cool it's not even funny."

...

Meanwhile, our two favorite party girls were eating breakfast in a crappy diner. Ivy was sipping at a cup of coffee while Harley was devouring a slice of cherry pie.

"We've got clothes. But we need money." Ivy said.

"We could donate blood." Harley offered. Ivy just looked at her for a minute, before she took a fork and pricked her finger. Harley watched as a drop of green blood burned through the counter. "Ooh. Yeah. But we don't have any of our gadgets, except for our amazing intellects." Harley said before she started feeling around under her seat for gum, which she then put behind her ear for later. "Yeah..." Ivy trailed off before she started to brainstorm.

"Come on. We're two..." Ivy stopped when she saw Harley pulling some of the pie filling out to make a smile on the plate, which she started kissing. "I'm one of the most brilliant female criminal masterminds on the-"

DING DING.

"Uh-oh. Lunch meat at two o'clock." Two snotty jerks just came into the diner, and set their sights on Harley and Ivy. They walked up to the two.

"Hey baby. How's the coffee?" the jerk asked. "You tell me." Ivy tossed the hot cup in his face, causing him to clutch at his eyes and scream in agony. His friend didn't take the hint as he tried to hit on Harley.

"Hey cutie. Can I try somea your pie?" "Sure!" WHAM! The plate went right in has face. Then came the kid with the vid-pads holding the daily news.

"Come one! Come all! To the Metropolis Museum of Super-Villainy! Open to the public for the very first time!"

"But where are we going to get our tools? We ain't exactly MacGeyver, Red."

"I'm working on it, Harl."

"Come see the great artifacts of villainy past!"

"Maybe we should hotwire a Delorian?" Harley asked. "I'm not paying Michael J. Fox royalties."

"HELLO!! ANYONE IN THERE?!" The little guy was knocking on their heads.

"What?!" They both screamed at him. He held the vid-pads right in their faces. "Come see the Metropolis Museum of Super-Villainy! Do I gotta write it in blood before you guys listen?!"

"I'll take care of this pipsq-" Harley began rolling up her sleeves before Ivy cut her off. "Go on." The guy handed them a vid-pad. Ivy read it aloud as Harley began to lament her lost pie.

"Hmm, says here they've got exhibits featuring the weapons and costumes of some of the greatest villains of the 21st Century. Inlcuding Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn."

"That's oddly coincidental, dontch'a think?"

"Shall we?" "Let's!"

The two got up from the counter, before the man behind the cash register stopped them.

"Hey! You didn't pay for your meal!"

The two just look at the man, before they burst into laughter.

"You gonna pay for their meals?" He said to the kid with the vid-pads.

"Oh, actually, I'm supposed to be meeting a friend here for brunch. I'll ask for him. MCGURK!!"

...

"Why are you here?"

It was early morning in the Legion kitchen. Cosmic Boy was trying to stake out Scooby, currently devouring three boxes of cereal. And Ebony was sitting at the table watching the both of them.

"To make sure you don't kill him." She was joking.

"And why's he here?"

Behind them, Sun Boy was watching her.

"To make sure I don't kill you." That time she was being serious. "Why can't you just leave him alone. You didn't give this much trouble when I came here." "Well that's because I didn't know what to expect from you. And now we have a talking dog."

"Rog? Rhere?" Scooby looked up from the box of Count Chocula. "There's no dog, Scooby, just finish your breakfast." Ebony said. Dirk decided to speak up.

"Y'know, I gotta say, the way Garth is acting with this dog is kinda g-" he stopped when he saw the glare he was getting from Ebony. And the way she was walking over to the knife drawer.

"You wanna think that sentence before you finish it?"

He didn't want to risk it. Instead, he just left the room, leaving Cos to her mercy.

"Well, it's just, how the hell can he talk? It's impossible!" Cos exasperated.

"Says the man in the purple jumpsuit with the magnet hands."

"Excuse me?"

"You think that a talking dog is impossible? Hmm. Why don't _I_, the girl from a parallel universe, go ask the opinions of the rock guy, the guy made up of antimatter energy, and the boy who can inflate into a ball." She crossed her arms as she glared at him.

"I can admit that there are strange things in the world, but a talking dog is just silly."

"You really think there's a limit to how ridiculous things get in the world!"

"Yes!"

There was a brief pause. Scooby stopped eating and looked back and forth at the two mortal enemies.

"You want some coffee?" Cos did a doubletake.

"You serious?" "100." "Sure."

At that moment, Ebony started to take off her socks.

"What are you doing?"

"About to get you coffee."

As she did, she then got on her hands and started walking over to the counter. On her hands. Then, she took out a mug from the dish drainer and began to pour coffee into the mug. Using her feet. As she did she was scatting a little tune to herself as Cos watched in shock and disgust.

"_Work it out, work it out, we've got to make it re-al_."

She then walked over to the fridge and took out a quart of milk.

"Milk or cream?"

He didn't respond.

"Milk it is."

She then began to pour in the milk, then three spoons of sugar, and started to stir it with her left foot as her right foot held the mug. Some of it spilled on the counter. "Scooby be a dear and get me a napkin." "Rotcha." He complied. "Thanks babe."

She got back on her feet and walked over to Cos with the mug. He was white as a sheep with fear. "Well...?" He just covered his mouth and flew out of the kitchen. "What's his problem?" she asked the Great Dane. "Ri runno."

Garth then flew in, looking very worried.

"Ebony have you seen-"

"Morning Shaggy Man."

"Rorning Raggy!"

Scooby walked over to Garth, and he let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh, there you are! When I woke up and he wasn't thought he ran off."

"And why would a dog this loveable want to run away from a loveable lug like you?"

"Ha ha. What did you do to Cos?"

"Nothing, I just asked if he wanted some coffee, right Scooby?" She looked down at Scooby.

"Right." She patted his head.

"Good boy. And don't you have breakfast to be making me?" She sipped at the coffee. And somewhere, Cos was retching.

"Ugh, fine. This must be how Brin feels." Garth complained.

"Hey! How come you don't make me breakfast? I'm starting to wonder why I'm even in this relationship." Nura was standing in the kitchen doorway, along with Imra. Boyfriend and girlfriend exchanged a morning kiss. Imra felt sick.

"Do you want breakfast, Nura?" he asked. "Pancakes, blueberry. Coffee, cream and sugar, and a bagel with fat-free cream cheese. I've gotta watch my figure, you know." She ran the list off automatically.

"You're not the only one." Garth said.

"Amen." Ebony joined in.

"Reah."

Nura pointed to Garth and Scooby. "You two, jerks." She then pointed to Ebony. "You, creepy."

"What about me?" Imra asked. _What am I, chopped liver_?

"Am I making breakfast for everyone, then?"

"No some of them already ate." Imra said.

"And you two?"

"I just wanted some Cocoa Pebbles." Ebony said.

"Rancakes!" Scooby cried happily.

"You guys are lucky I grew up on a farm."

"Yeah, so we can hear you recolate of how you used to go to the ol' swimmin' hole with them good ol' boys." Nura drawled.

"You're confusing farm boy with southern hick." Ebony informed.

Nura and Imra started to get the plates out, and they couldn't hear Ebony.

"Oh and, in the future..." she got up close to Garth.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"Lay off the salsa chips." She waved her hand. "Reah! P.U.!" Scooby held a hand over his nose. "Not many people can appreciate your talents like I can."

"Freak."

"Farmboy."

"I don't know why I put up with you."

"That's why we love ya Shaggy!"

To Be Continued...


End file.
